2 years ago vs. Today

As I was sitting in first hour band class yesterday, I was thinking about the differences between the person I was two years ago and the person who sits here writing this blog today. I don't think it was really a spiritual thing I was thinking about. I was thinking about band.

I am currently in Wind Symphony, which is the better band at my school. Currently, I sit as second chair flute. Two years ago, I got 2nd chair in Concert band and I was so excited. Today I hate it. I have the same stand partner that I had then and she does not like to share.

I don't know if it's the girl or what that I just hate that chair. It could also be that I don't like playing the first flute part. I like the harmony part and that's not only because it's kinda easier. I like to play something different from everyone else. It's because I'm different.

You know I was also thinking about all this with some anxiety. I haven't taken this year's chair test and I'm not sure I will. I guess you could say that I have really bad senioritis and I don't feel like doing anything especially for band. This playing test is for a grade though. But I haven't really practiced is one problem and I haven't signed up for a time either. And I know my parents are gonna be even more upset with me than they currently are if I don't take that test. They're still a little upset about NHS.

Two years ago, I was so excited to take this chair test and last year I was ok with it, but this year I just don't care. It's kinda sad, but I think I'm just ready to get out of this class. I guess I'm ready to get out of high school too. Of course, 2 years ago I was a sophomore. In case you don't know what sophomore means, it's wise fool.

Now thinking about it on the spiritual track of things, 2 years ago and today were similar. Last year, I don't know what my problem was, but I was having such a bad year with my spirituality. It was just a season of no learning I guess, a season of no spiritual growth.

2 years ago, I really changed. You've probably heard me talk about all this before. But I seriously changed for the better. I don't like change a lot, but this change or transformation was amazing. My spiritual life was thriving and I was loving life (not saying I haven't enjoyed it since then). I loved hanging out with my youth group and our awesome youth pastors especially.

Then last year, I felt like I had lost all of it.

This year though is much similar to 2 years ago. 2 years ago, I wondered if all that I was feeling was real or if it was just because of my youth pastors. This year, I know it's for real. It's not fake, it's for real. It was real 2 years ago and it's real today.

Ok I think it's time for some fun.

#3 What if you could be invisible?

• Sometimes I honestly wish I could be invisible. Sometimes I wonder if I'm invisible to those around me. My friend and I talked about doing a psychological test last year with me walking around with a piece of paper taped on my shirt saying that you can't see me and I'm invisible. That's probably not very ethical, but we thought it would be an interesting idea to try. I think I could hide very well if I had the ability to be invisible. It would probably be really cool sometimes.
  

#142 What if you got to be Santa Claus for a night?

• This is the perfect question for the month that it is. I was reading someone else's blog tonight and they were talking about guys dressed up as Santa Claus in the malls and I just thought to myself, "Santa's not real?!" I was joking of course. I've known that for a long time. My parents broke my heart with that one. Well if I were Santa, I would love to deliver the toys. I think it's better to give than to receive. Santa's workshop would probably be amazing, but I wouldn't want to keep all the toys for myself. There are kids out there who are way more deserving.
  

#14 What if you could live anywhere in the world?

• If I could live anywhere in the world, I would probably stay right where I am even though Michigan's economy is in a rut right now. My economics teacher has hopes that we'll all stay in Michigan, but because of the rut this state is in, most are trying to get out of this place. It's kinda sad. I would kinda like to live somewhere a little warmer though. I hate winter!
  

#51 Have you ever felt really close to your family? (When? What caused you to feel close? Why? Did you tell them?)

• I probably have. I can't think of a particular time right now though. Are we talking about extended family or just house family? I think I tend to feel closest to family when I know I won't see them for a while like for example if my parents go on vacation. I worry about them. I do tell them that I worry and I'll miss them.
  

#278 Have you ever smelled rotten meat? (Where? Describe the smell. How did you feel? What happened?)

• It's probable. But does dead animal count? Because dead animal is pretty rank. One time, my hamster died under the couch and we didn't realize it and it smelled so bad for the longest time. It was disgusting.
  

#317 Have you ever surfed? (Where? What did you like or dislike about it? How did you feel?)

• I have never surfed. Does a boogie board count though? I did boogie board when I was in South Carolina. It was cool. I didn't very much like the extreme ways in some parts and I really didn't like the idea that we were swimming with sharks. I got to hold a baby shark and a crab on that vacation. Boogie boarding was a lot of fun though.

Teenagers are a...

Nuisance.

Of all the words that could go there, I chose this one. If you've thought this before, then I would say you're probably not alone in thinking this. I'm sure there are plenty of adults who've thought this before.

Let me talk to the teens here. I may be 18, but have you noticed what is at the end of that number? Yeah, it's teen. So yeah, I'm still a teen. Besides what adult would think that I'm an adult? Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever felt like adults think you're too smart? Or maybe you've felt as if adults don't care what you're saying. I hate when I feel as if adults aren't listening to what I have to say. I hate when they think I'm too smart. I can't help it that when I get bored I Google things to find out about things.

Now adults. Can you cut us a break? It's hard being a teen if you don't remember, which some of you might not. We're dealing with many pressures here and we don't need you to add on to the pressure. We can't help it if we're being a smart alec. Some of us really do like to look up things on the internet. Most of us act this way, like we're smarter than you because our brains aren't developed yet and probably won't be until we're in our 20s. Could you just listen to us?

You know how everyone has a different perspective of how they see things? Infants don't think the same as toddlers. Toddlers don't think the same as children. Children don't think the same as teens. And teens definitely have a different perspective than adults.

This I learned in psychology. Sometimes my teacher would make a certain face and someone in class would ask if she were mad or something. But she was only thinking and she was perfectly fine. Teens, we see things different from adults and we probably explain things in an even more different way.

Today I went to a different Sunday school class for all sorts of ages. I was in the middle of explaining how I felt about a certain quote by C.S. Lewis. The quote was: "always December but never Christmas." I referenced a song by Relient K because they sing that it's always winter but never Christmas. I was probably wrong to assume the others would get what I was talking about though because someone raised their hand and explained it exactly the way I meant it.

I just felt so annoyed by that older adult saying that. It makes me think of 1 Timothy 4:12.

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.

It drives me crazy when adults look down on us. What's worse is when people who work with us teens look down on us. If those who work with us feel we're such nuisances, then why do you work with us? Why do you help us with stuff if we're so annoying? Are you just trying to be a good Christian by helping us?

I know adults are supposed to be the smart ones and this could be my still developing brain, but sometimes it feels like the adults are the ones being smart alecs. Don't tell us how to do something in a snooty, bragging sort of way because we're either not going to learn it or we're not going to want to learn it.

You all realize that Jesus likes children right? Teens are considered children because we're obviously not adults yet. Adults, what would Jesus do? I think that's the question we all should be asking. I don't think Jesus would call teenagers nuisances. The Bible says children are a gift from God.

As for those of you adults who actually like to hang out with us and get to know us, I want to say thank you. I know you are the ones who probably never grew up and that's ok because you totally fit in with us teens. Thank you for making a difference in our lives. Thank you for challenging us to build stronger relationships with God every day?

I'm not going to say that all adults are wimps or that adults are wimps at all. But I think it takes a courageous person with a patient heart to want to teach a bunch of crazy teenagers.

Making myself laugh

Ok, here's the deal. I had a rough day. I hate precalc already after having 4 days of it. My stand partner who is first chair was picking on me to play a part I didn't want to play because the person who usually plays it was gone, but as she is first chair, she should have to play it. I don't understand what I was supposed to do for my term paper, so I just went along with it and tried to make it fit together. It's just the topic though. Although I had a fun time at our Christmas program rehearsal, I'm still really frustrated about these two classes that I hate: government and precalc. I have to pass government to graduate and I'm taking precalc because I figure I'll be taking calculus in college. So in order to relieve some stress, I'm gonna make myself laugh and hopefully you will to, with some what ifs and have you evers.

#297 What if you could set your own allowance?

• I don't even have an allowance. I never have either. Though if I did, it would be for doing chores and I would probably set it at $5 a week. I don't spend my money, so really whatever amount is fine.

#320 What if your parents didn't approve of the person you were dating?

• Well I'm not dating anyone at the moment because high school relationships are too pointless. Why bother if I know it's not going to last? If I were in love hypothetically (which won't happen in high, it's called puppy-love people) and in that stage of picking my spouse. Have you seen The Family Stone? My parents would just have to get used to the person I was dating because I were in love with the guy and we were thinking about marriage, then my parents would have to get over their problems with my boyfriend.

#433 What if your parents didn't like your friends?

• That one is kinda not a hypothetical question there. My parents are ok with the people I hang out with, but they probably think that I could have better friends if I really wanted to. But by trying for other friends, I probably wouldn't be acting like myself and that's one reason I have the friends that I do.

#320 Have you ever gone cow tipping? (Where? Who were you with? Why? What happened? How did you feel?)

• Is it even possible to tip a cow? I didn't think it was and hence I've never done that before nor would I probably ever want to.

#387 Have you ever had a leech stuck to you? (How did it happen? How did you feel? What did you do?)

• I must be very uncultured. I haven't gone cow tipping and I haven't had leeches stuck to me. Have you ever seen Stand By Me? After watching that, I don't want to go into water where leeches might be lurking. Though I think I've been to a lake that had leeches one time, but I didn't get any on me.

#49 Have you ever had a car accident that you didn't tell your parents about? (What? When? Where? Why didn't you tell? What happened? Did you ever tell?)

• I'm a pretty good driver (knock on wood), so for the 2 years that I have been driving alone, I haven't gotten into a car accident. I have hit the curb a few times, but that's it. My brother, on the other hand, is in driver's ed and on Thanksgiving night, he came within 5 inches of hitting a deer. That was scary!

Ok, so maybe these aren't totally funny. Some are, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. However, I just found out that my brother lost his dog. No, it's not a toy dog. It's a real dog, a chihuahua to be exact. At first that was really funny to me because last time this happened, my brother forgot his dog was outside. Now we seriously can't find him. If he doesn't return in 3 days and the back room starts smelling horrible, then we'll know that he died. As mean as that may sound, it has happened to us before with my hamster who died under the couch downstairs. How she got there, we're not sure. We think she escaped from her cage and somehow got downstairs and just got dehydrated and died. It smelled so bad in there for a while before we found her.

Getting hit in the face

No, I'm not talking physical. I didn't get hit in the face physically today. Besides I'm not the type to get into fights at school. Though I already once this year got beat up. If my government teacher hadn't been standing out there, I would have been lunged at, but I wouldn't have fought back. I would just fall to the ground in the fetal position.

Anyways enough of the past trimester and onto my subject. Like I said I'm not talking about getting physically hit in the face like with a fist or a snowball. I'm talking about getting hit in the face mentally.

Have you ever read some of my blogs and thought, "Where did she get such an idea?" Where do my ideas come from for blogs?

Well, I'll give you my most honest answer. I have no idea. They just hit me in the face sometimes. I don't go looking for them or look for signs of them. I guess I just get hit. I don't know why these blogs hit me, but they do.

I don't know if I'm helping someone or maybe just myself. Maybe I'm writing this now for future references. Go look me up on http://www.battlecry.com under Chelsea2009. I often go back and read through some of my past blogs and some have really helped me.

I got this idea to write a blog like this from a blog I was reading the other day. They were talking about how they wanted to blog on a daily basis, but didn't always know what to write. I don't always write on a daily basis, but lately I have been writing a few blogs a day. I'm not sure why, but I guess I just have a lot on my mind right now. That's a good thing. I love to write. It's one of my favorite things to do.

Like I said before, I don't know where I get some of these crazy ideas for blogs. I think God puts them in there for a reason. I don't know who I'm helping or what I'm really doing to impact the lives of those who read this blog, but just know I'm glad to do it.

Worshiping idols

What is one movie that came out recently that everyone has been anticipating? Do you know it? Was it The Boy in the Striped Pajamas? No, I don't think it was that one. Was it Four Christmases? Maybe it could have been, but that's still not the one I'm thinking about. Think about it.

You old people (I don't call you adults because I'm considered an adult now), what is the movie teen girls have been fantasizing about for the longest time? No, it's not Harry Potter 6 either. Do you know what I'm talking about? I think we need to be on the same page in order to understand this blog. Maybe you've been saying you knew it all along even though I haven't given the answer yet.

If you've been saying that, did you guess Twilight? Because if you did, you got it right. I've heard good reviews and bad reviews on this movie. I, myself, have not seen the movie or read the books. Most of my friends, however, are in love Edward Cullen. I guess when I get around to it, maybe I'll read the book, but I don't want to be all psycho like everyone else right now.

No, I'm not afraid that I'll do what everyone else is, but rather I just want things to die down before I read it. I also just don't want to get mixed up in that worshiping of idols.

Oh my, did I just go there? Yes, I did. I'm not saying everyone's doing it, but I know a lot of people who seem to be worshiping a fictional character and/or book.

I have an application on my Facebook called Pieces of Flair and almost everything on Flair right now is about Twilight. And actually it has been like this for a few months now. I'm kinda tired of it. I haven't even read the book and I know all this information about it. People seem to be obsessed with it. I wish they were obsessed with God.

Leviticus 26:1 says this: "'Do not make idols or set up an image or a sacred stone for yourselves, and do not place a carved stone in your land to bow down before it. I am the Lord your God.'"

I wish these people were worshiping God. Unfortunately they're not. I'm not saying Twilight is the only idol problem we have in this society. Do you know how many people practically worship Harry Potter or even anime? How about the millions of people, mostly teens, who waste time on Facebook?

I'm not saying I'm perfect because have you met me? I'm not perfect. No one is perfect. In fact, I'm far from perfect. I will admit that I am pretty into Facebook. I procrastinate a lot on Facebook even though I could be doing better things like getting into the Word. I shouldn't, but I do.

Edward Cullen. You may think he's perfect, but he's not. He's fictional. God is real. God is perfect. Would you rather worship a fictional character or God? I choose God. You can't get much from a fictional character except fantasies, which you shouldn't be thinking about to begin with.

U-turn Youth

I drove into our parking lot this morning. There was still snow on the ground from last night. I noticed my vehicle was the second one to make tracks today. The first vehicle hadn't stayed, however. It simply drove into the lot, turned around, and left.

That's not uncommon for us. Because our building is located a short distance from an exit off of I-94, many people use our lot as a turn around.

That may bother some of our congregants, but I haven't heard any. And I kind of like the symbolism.

A place where people can turn their lives around and begin to head in a new direction.

Isn't that one picture of what The Church at its best is meant to be? I think so.

And this is the season for turnarounds. I know many in our culture will look for making changes January 1 with New Year's Resolutions. And that's great.

But on the Christian calendar we are in a time period called Advent. Advent means "a coming or arrival" (Webster's Concise Dictionary).

Advent is the season when we:

1. Remember God in Christ Jesus coming to earth as a little, helpless Baby

2. Anticipate God showing up into our regular, everyday lives

3. Anticipate Christ's return to earth again at the consummation of all things

Long before Jesus was born, the Prophet Isaiah called the people to, "Prepare a pathway for the Lord's coming! Make a straight road for him!" (Isaiah 40:3 NLT)

Isaiah was trying to get people ready for an Advent.

Advent says that while God's arrival into our lives is a gift, there are preparations for us to make.

Advent says that while God is the main character, we have a part to play prior to God's arrival.

One way we play our part is making U-turns.

Or maybe a You-turn.

Of course, it is always easier to see where other people need to turn around, isn't it?

"You can a better parent."

"You should be a more supportive wife."

"You could be a more attentive husband."

"You ought to be a better friend."

But I don't think Advent is about correcting others. Our fixation upon others' faults is what Jesus refers to when he mentions getting the plank out of my own eye before I try to help you get the speck out of yours. Ouch.

No, advent is probably more about I-Turns. (To my knowledge, Apple has not coined the phrase yet. But if they do, would you be my witness that we thought of it first?)

Advent gives me a chance to ask, "What could I do to prepare for God's coming into my life?"

and

"What might my life look like if God really would show up in a brand new way?"

Think of the choices we have of things we could do to prepare:

- I could read the Christmas story

- I could find music or art that turns my attention to God's activity in the world

- I could seek out ways to help others who are in need

- I could attend a Christmas Eve service with candles or a Children's Pageant

- I could spend a few minutes in silent prayer and meditation

- I could set aside 10 minutes everyday between now and Christmas to anticipate God's arrival into my life and the lives of those I love

I don't want to simply remember Christmases past. I want to anticipate God's coming into our world today and participate in fresh, new things that might be in store for me if I'm simply fully present and open to them.

How 'bout you?

Grace & peace

This was the devotion I got in an email today. While the whole thing was good, I want to focus on the first part. The story about my pastor going to the church this morning.

I liked in particular what he was saying about the symbolism. A place where people can turn their lives around and begin to head in a new direction.

I've heard that one used before. My dad talks about my pastor saying that all the time. He really likes the idea of it too. I think I read something somewhere or maybe it was my dad talking about how there is a church in my town that doesn't allow U-turns in their parking lot. Doesn't that just make you want to go do donuts in their parking lot? It makes me want to do that.

Ok so it might not make you want to, but what kind of Christians would we be to do that? So exactly, I haven't done that nor will I probably ever, but I thought it was funny to think about.

So tonight I started putting the pieces together once again with this symbolism and youth group. Yes, I've thought about it before, but I never asked my youth pastors if this was the reason. What am I even talking about?

Well when we had our youth pastor/intern/leader people since they started out as interns, our youth group was dubbed as U-turn Youth Ministries.

I guess when we called ourselves that I never really thought about it, but nowadays I think a lot about it. I don't know what we our calling ourselves anymore, but I think U-turn Youth is good. I actually asked one of my old youth pastors about that tonight and she said it was about us turning our lives around and beginning in a new direction. I love that!

It's an awesome thought especially where my church is located. And I really wouldn't mind keeping this name for our youth group. It does make a lot of sense when you think about it. If we call ourselves this, then I think we should really open our arms to other teens who want to turn their lives around and start fresh.

And I probably already mentioned this, but I'll say it again just in case. My pastor said their might be people in the church who disagree with people who do U-turns in the church parking lot, but I think it's absolutely awesome.

A few weeks ago, I waited in the church with our choir director for her husband to come pick her up and a van pulled into the parking lot. We expected it to turn around, but it didn't. They parked and just sat there. We wondered if they were a little late to church or something. So my choir director went out there to find out what was going on. Turns out they had some little kids in the back that were hungry on a long trip and just stopped to make sandwiches. I think that's really cool.

We don't have a fence around our church because we want people to come in. Sure, that means we might get rocks thrown through windows, which did happen earlier this year, but it's just a more welcoming environment. To me having a fence or gate to the church is like having closed arms, but by having an opened area that has no gate, it allows for us to have open arms. It's like saying, "You're welcome here. Come in."

If you want to take a car U-turn in our church's parking lot, go ahead. But if you ever want to take a personal U-turn for your life, we'll always be here for you with open arms.

Needs vs. Wants

Today I started a whole lot of new classes. Well 3 new classes to be exact. One of them I hate, one I am totally scarred from, and the other I found something very interesting in today. It was economics. I have the same teacher I had for government last trimester, so it should prove to be a very interesting, fun class because this teacher is very funny in my opinion.

So what's so great about economics? Well I'm not really sure, but the activity he had us do today proved very interesting. He asked to stand up when we had something that he mentioned.

How many of you have a cell phone? Almost everyone in class stood up. Stay standing if you have an ipod or some sort of mp3 player. Almost everyone stayed standing. Stay standing if you own more than one video game system. Once again just about everyone stayed standing.

We were talking about wants and needs today. Do we need all this stuff? No, but do we want it? Yes and that's why we get it.

Think about the kids in Russia up north near Siberia. Those kids scrounge around in landfills for food. They live underground where there are pipes that never freeze because they're carrying something warm (I can't remember what it was though). These kids need food. They don't worry about getting texted or worry about getting home in time to watch their favorite show. They don't have a home to go to in most cases.

Americans are incredibly lucky in a way, but we take too much advantage of it sometimes. We complain about our food, our toys, and our clothes. What I'm usually telling the cats when they complain about the food that is in their dish is something I learned probably from A Christmas story except I change it around. There are starving people in China. Well I tell the cats that there are starving cats in China. Little do they know though, people in China are probably eating cats for all we know. Hey, they eat dogs in other countries. Disgusting to me, but not to them. In truth there are starving people all over the world.

Sure America has homeless people, but there are homeless people all over the world that need help. We as Americans should not complain about what we do or don't have, but rather give thanks. It could be worse, much worse.

I might sound a little selfish right there, but believe me I'm not trying to be. In fact, I think we should help the less fortunate. We should be sending Crisis Care Kits to countries in need and praying for those less fortunate in other countries and even in this country.